Green Scissors

Some of you noted the article that got hacked last week. That got me to thinking about an earlier post I made and the news I have been seeing on the various Nuke support sites.

The short version is this. While Nuke is a really robust framework with a lot of support out there, security has always been an issue. In recent weeks tere has been a bit of strife among some of the more active support sites. Competing security programs and some generally childish sniping among folks who should know better.

While nuke will continue to grow and progress it is becoming clear that it is evolving into a commercial grade architecture with a lot of security considerations that I don’t want to mess with.

So… I am planning on switching to a new software package in the near future. Right now the front runner is BlogCMS which is an offshoot of NucleusCMS. What does this mean for you, the loyal visitor? Well, there is good news and bad.

Good news. A better system that will allow easier updates. Things like right-click blogging (see something you want to write about? the blog entry is only one click away). It will still have the community feel that we currently employ. I will also be adding some of the things that make Green Scissors a place I visit everyday like phpGrabComics, a news reader and a photo gallery. And I will be putting up forums of some type (either phpBB which we currently use, or the hybrid forum that comes with the CMS) so all you Grazing Antelopes and others will still have a place to discuss your exploits. I will also be keeping the Zina Music System and plan to start adding music again.

The bad news. As with any major change, content migration is going to be a b!tch. On this count I will promise this. All articles that have been written here will be preserved in some form. I’m just not sure what that form will be yet. I may convert them to static pages, or keep some stripped down version of nuke running. In a perfect world I would find a way to drag them into the new blog format, but that is a pretty long range goal.

So there you have it gang. Keep an eye out for more news of this pending shift. I promise to give notice before I do anything crazy.

As many of you know, Jason is going to be laid off soon. Cast your vote for where he should pursue his next career opportunity. I guarantee that I will take all votes into serious consideration. Really, I promise.

I have been working on the Dragon Knight game for awhile and the ideas just keep coming. I realized last night that I probably will not be spending much time posting articles here between the game and the new job starting middle of next month. I’ve transition stuff to do at work and several travel plans for the summer.

So let this be a call to whomever else wants to chime in on the site. Now is the time!!!!! So lets see that poetry you’ve been hiding, that political rant you just can’t keep in anymore, or that crazy link you think we all need to know about.

I will be back in a month or so with some great vacation pics, a new job and a recharged battery.

At least on a personal front there is still no news to report. I have short-timers syndrome but still no word from the mighty HR gods on my new gig.

In an unrelated note, the Zen calendar today offers this:

A humble knowledge of thyself is a surer way to God than a deep search after learning.
-Thomas A Kempis

I’m feeling pretty close to God these days (He has bad breath BTW) but I’m not so sure about the humble part. I think I know myself well enough, and like the man says, "…its hard to be humble when your perfect in every way."

And on that completely ridiculous note…

Seems its not just a verb anymore. Residents of Fucking, Austria recently defeated a proposal to change the town’s name despite some problems attached to the unique moniker.

The 150 or so people who live in the village debated the issue after roadsigns kept being stolen - many by British tourists.

Spokesman Siegfried Hoeppl, said, "Everyone here knows what it means in English, but for us F*cking is F*cking - and it`s going to stay F*cking - even though the signs keep getting stolen."

Yetis, they’re not just legends anymore. If you haven’t seen Yeti Sports, creators of of the Pingu Toss games, check them out today. The 5th version, Flamingo Drive, sees our furry hero in Africa trying to smack the hapless tuxedoed fowl across the the safari landscape.

RPGers! Tired of all the old cliches? Then you will want to check out the beta version of Kingdom of Loathing. An online MUD style game that is sure to entertain. In lieu of the standard Warrior/Wizard/Theif arrangement, KoL offers some new charaters to play.

I just don’t know what to do with this but… You should check out the Cliche Dance anyway. Don’t ask for an explanation. Some people just have too much time on their hands.

How do you manage your links? Because the folks at Hyper-Link-O-Matic think they have a better way.

Hyperlinkomatic is a smart alternative to dumb lists of favorites and bookmarks.

You can grab links, makes notes, set multiple categories, search links, import links from web pages, upload bookmarks, create bookmarks files, share links, publish links. It is, in short, a place to keep your links.

After all, the net’s bigger than a favorites list. And it’s not getting any smaller…

One of the very nice features is that you can put a link in as many categories as you like and have a wonderful cross referenced library of links. I’m not completely sold on the interface but I think they have a pretty good base to work from.

Ever get asked stupid questions? Not anymore! When someone walks into your cube and asks how many barrels are in a hogshead or other equally annoying inquiries, just tell them to FGI it.

And that, my dear friends is all the Grind you need to enjoy another weekend.

Why is today less of a grind you ask? Well, it seems that I am about to get a new gig with my company. A few steps up the food chain and (hopefully) a few more scheckles in the pocket.

So with that merry news in my heart I bring you the news here.

First, I’ve added an exciting new piece to the site. Dragon Knight is a MUD style game that is simple yet addictive. It is also programmed in such a way that we can make some fun additions to it. If you would like to see some of the ideas and contribute your own stories, check out the Dragon Knight forum right here at Green Scissors. I will keep the game up and running as long as the badwidth holds out. If we start to use up too much I may look into buying more bandwidth.

With that said, here are a few more items for today…..

"Say Harry, does that invisibility cloak still work?" Fresh on the heels of the SNL skit last week comes news that someone actually has developed an invisibility cloak. Now I can think of some nifty uses for such a device, but none of them make me look like the fine upstanding moral citizen I pretend to be, so I’ll let you think up your own.

The inventor does seem to have the best intrest of humanity at heart though. He proposes windows for windowless rooms and planes that let the pilot see the runway through the floor. But really, Evil Masterminds everywhere have to be salivating at this one.

Disagree with me? You must be a vertically challenged heathen! Religion is one thing I try not to discuss too often since my general views seem to clash with my fellow man here in the midwest. But if I ever do find myself in such a discussion this guide to arguing religion should prove invaluable

Arguing is fun and religious argument should be treated as a game. Like other games, it has participants, spectators, winners, and losers. Problems arise, however, when none of the participants of a sacred-squabble recognize the purpose of the competition. It is mistakenly perceived to be either a defense of beliefs or a persuasion of truth. However, as in most religious activities, image is the actual objective.

What is the average air speed velocity of an unladen Fell Beast? There are an increasing number of mash ups of Tolkein’s works One of my favorites is the Sillmarillion in 1000 words. But the new champion of the Middle Earth mash ups is Monty Python Lord of the Rings. It gets good marks in both completeness and creativity. In fact, if you have the time you can giggle your way through all three Lord of the Rings books.

Frodo: Hello? Bilbo???
Gandalf: He has gone.

Frodo: What?!? Gone?
Gandalf: Yes, and he has left you his ring…
Frodo: Left me his ring? His most precious possession?
Gandalf: Yes, indeed. I had to whack his arse with a boat paddle, but he finally agreed to leave it. He left it there conveniently laying in the middle of the floor for you.
[Frodo picks up the ring]
Frodo: It is but a plain gold band.
Gandalf: Hmmmpfh. Is it now…
[Gandalf knocks the ring out of Frodo's hand, casting it into the fireplace]
Frodo: What the… Hey!
Gandalf: Fear not. The ring is unharmed.
Frodo: I’m not worried about the ruddy thing, you hit my hand you looney wizard!
Gandalf: Enough! Let us gaze upon the ring.
Frodo: Odd, the ring is cool though it has been touched by the flames… and strangely heavier.
Gandalf: Look for writing, Frodo… do you see any?
Frodo: Yes! Here… along the inside… it says "Orodruin Jewlers 10-Karat."
Gandalf: The tight-pocketed fiend! He could have at least made the forsaken thing out of 14 or 18-Karat gold…
Frodo: Who?

Who indeed. Don’t miss the Uruk-Cow in the first installment.

And with that, dear friends, I leave you to your day.

Hello all. Almost time for a sunny weekend. But before you go, I thought you might want one more edition of The Daily Grind

Before you star the grind though, take a minute to check out the review of Life of Brian posted today. Some needed information in there as you await the release of this classic in your town. Go on, read it. I’ll wait…..

…………

Done? Good, and now onto the Grind……

But will it only play ATRAC format? Regular readers of The Grind know that I suffer from gadget lust almost daily. But when I came across reviews for the new Sony U70 Tablet PC I was smitten even more than usual. Billed as the smallest full functioning PC available, the U70 sports some modest but effective hardware in a form factor that can be easily hauled all over and back again. With a 1GHz processor, 512 Mb of memory and a 20Gb hard drive, the pen based tablet PC should be able to handle almost anything the Road Warrior might want to do. And with a form factor of less than 8" x 6" it should fit neatly into almost any bag.

And if you buy this, I’ve got a bridge to sell you. It seems that the folks at Audio Advisor are big fans of wishful thinking and Defense Department contracts. How esle can you explain a $744 AC power cord? At that price I expect it to come with a 19" plasma screen attached to the far end.

Still one of the most interesting people I never want to meet. It seems that one of my favorite bloggers, Jawa has been pondering the need for mythical heros for todays youth. And as always, he has some off beat but thought provoking suggestions.

Face it. Youth have the attention spans of puppies. If you want to communicate with them, you have to be quick, clear and concise. Especially nowadays. ￜJust Say Noￜ is quick, itￜs to the point. You start on that ￜIt takes a lot of gutsￜ and youￜre screwed because kids are already tuning out. What they hear is ￜIt takes a lot of guts to talk to a friend about I wonder if thereￜs any pudding left.ￜ

The Cyborgs are coming. But maybe its not a bad thing. In the quest to control machinery with the mind alone, the folks at Washington University, St Louis Mo have taken a big step. They have managed to allow patients to play video games with their minds by embedding sensors on the surface of the brain.

They then asked the patients to play a simple, one-dimensional computer game involving moving a cursor up or down towards one of two targets. They were asked to imagine various movements or imagine saying the word "move," but not to actually perform them with their hands or speak any words by mouth. When they saw the cursor in the video game, they then controlled it with their brains.

I am still waiting for my hands free keyboard, but in the mean time, this shows real promise for people with disablitites.

Lassie! Bring me last week’s Sunday Times. Seems a well trained border collie is giving researchers some new things to ponder when it comes to animal intelligence. Rico, a 10 year old pooch can apparently identify over 200 objects by name and retrieve them, even when they are out of site. What’s even more amazing is the dogs apparent ability to associate a previously unseen object with a new word and retrieve that object from amongst a pile of its other toys.

When they put a new object into a room filled with old objects, Rico was able to fetch it 7 out of 10 times, evidently figuring out that the new word he was given must refer to the new object.

Four weeks later, he apparently remembered this new word about half the time. "This retrieval rate is comparable to the performance of 3-year-old toddlers," the researchers wrote.

Next you’ll be telling me that three year old children can be trained too!

Well, that’s all for today. Enjoy your weekend and remeber if you drop your keys on the interstate, just leave them there.

Yes, its been nigh on a week now since the Grind made its last appearence. But, inspired by our recent victory I am pleased to bring you a collection of Internet madness that has been hours in the making.

Today we have wolves, lasers, and a doll for all of us nerds with a softer side. Read on if you dare……

Its mean, its green, its the next evolution of the annoying laser pointer: From Mega Laser comes the latest advance in laser pointers. I’m not sure what you would do with a 15Mw continuous wave green beam of extreme annoyance. But as always, the geek lust rises and I think it would look nice dangling from my keychain.

See all the amazing “light saber effect” in their gallery.

But beware the dangers.

“*Please note: The 15mw Class IIIb units can be dangerous and should never be handled by children or pointed at people, animals or any moving vehicles especially aircraft. The sale of these units is prohibited to minors and they may be illegal in some countries.”

Speaking of cool toys, finally something for the pocket protector crowd: Geek Man is sure to take his place next to G.I. Joe in the “It’s not a doll, it’s an action figure” debate. This 6″ hunk of plastic and nerdy knowledge is the must have Christmas toy for Bit Heads everywhere. With his array of hi-tech accessories and stunning good looks, can a date with Barbie be far off?

From the new to the old in the world of binary wonder: Colossus was (arguably) the first ever programable computer. Built at Bletchly Park, England during WWII in an attempt to crack the German’s Enigma and Lorenz cryptography. Well, it seems that the Science Museum in London has seen fit to rebuild Colossus.

Unlike me, some people have way too much time on their hands: It seems that a misguided British youth used online chat rooms to convince his friend to murder him. I would like to explain the whole story but its just too bizarre. Suffice to say that the plot involved our genius posing as a female British spy among other characters. The judge in the case began his ruling thusly “Skilled writers of fiction would struggle to conjure up a plot such as that which arises here.” Be sure to give the whole article a read.

Finally, lest you think there is nothing but technology in the world: Scientific American has a fascinating article on the effect to Yellowstone Park due to the repopulation of wolves. While the article is balanced enough to present some dissenting opinions, it is a fascinating look at how eco systems are interdependent.

It seems that in the 1920s wolves were hunted into oblivion in Yellowstone because they were seen as a threat. In 1995 it was decided that the wolf needed to be returned to the park. The results are stunning. Elk population is down. No surpise there, but how does the return of the wolf increase the beaver and grizzly population of the park? Hippie tree hugging aside, I got a new appreciation for how delicate the balance in nature truly is.

A final word: The Topic category of “Adult” has been removed from the site. It had not been a very frequented area and recently has drawn advertisements masquerading as articles from some websites that I’d rather not have associated with Green Scissors. As always, this site will not post advertisements in any section of the content. A personal recommendation is one thing, but if you have a product you want to sell, you’d best contact me first (see the link in the menu) and approach it in a business like fashion. Submitting anonymous articles will get you nowhere.

Just a quick note to let everyone know that the Green Scissors team took the Crystal Cup at the W.J. McBrides Pub Quiz Championship in Overland Park, KS.

After finishing second on several occasions during the season, the Green Scissors team (registered members include Tamarin, dawnuh, Cherish and Nancy) staged an amazing run through the middle rounds of the championship and held off late rallies by several teams including two time defending champs Gertrude Ederle to come away with the win. The final margin of victory was less than 30 points (translating into three correct answers over the 8 round competition).

Significant answers during the finals include the correct identification of Benito Mussolini, a near guess at the original number of Supreme Court Justices, correctly filling in the blanks on Black Eyed Peas lyrics and in an improbable lark of a correct answer coming up with the movie Leprechan 2 based on a plot synopsis and tag line.

It’s not funny, or cool, it’s not helpful, and I don’t really believe that they are really wanting to make an effort to get out of the way. If they aren’t going to actually hustle…I’d appreciate it id they’d just walk normally, afterall, they do have the right of way.

You’ve seen it, I’m sure. You’re stopped at a stop sign at a four way intersection… and someone on foot approaches the intersection… Just about the time it’s your turn to go the person has stepped out in front of your path.

The person then noticing that they are "in the way" hunches up their shoulders and feigns the motions of running with their arms, while the rest of their body just strolls along leisurly…on occassion you might encounter the odd high stepper…but the pace stays the same.

Who do they think they’re fooling? Is it intentional?

My advice to them…Don’t irritate people behnd the wheel of a one ton killing machine with retarded antics that merely taunt them. Maybe next time they’ll faux brake.

Responsibility. Itï¿œs a word that conjures up images of toiling at a job you hate, paying your bills on time, and taking out the trash before a foul and mysterious odor permeates the kitchen. In short, responsibility makes us think of all the things we donï¿œt like, but are forced, to do.

Yet it seems to me that responsibility is getting a bad name here. For every obligation it seems to force upon us, it provides a corresponding degree of freedom. More to the point, in fact, thatï¿œs what responsibility is; freedom.

To get from obligation to freedom, you have to view responsibility not as a burden, but a simple statement of fact. In truth, we are all responsible for our lives. Does that just mean that we have to pay our bills and go to the dentist? On the surface, maybe, those are some expressions of responsibility. But ultimately, what it means is that all the events in your life have occurred because of the choices youï¿œve made. Think of the last painting you sawï¿œthere wasnï¿œt a single brushstroke there by accident; they were all there because of the actions of the artist. Now consider: you are the artist of your own life. Every event, every person, every image, is there because youï¿œve drawn it there. And the beautiful part is, like the artist, you can always change the picture, or switch to a new canvas altogether. And thatï¿œs the ultimate truth of responsibility. When you look back at it through the lens of time, it appears a burden, but when you look ahead toward the possibilities, itï¿œs all a blank canvas, waiting to be filled in.

Of course, not everything in our lives seems to be there by design, right? After all, everyone feels as though they are adrift from time to time, their lives changing at the whims of others or of fate rather than by their own decisions. And yet itￜs still true that no matter what other factors there are, it is the individualsￜ actions that led them to the present.

Consider. Iￜm divorced, live in the suburbs of Chicago and work as a corporate trainer. I probably never would have moved to Chicago if I hadnￜt gotten married ￜ my ex is from the area originally. Obviously, I wouldnￜt have married her if we hadnￜt met. Ours was a long-distance relationship, and I met her when she was visiting a mutual friend at college in Missouri. Eventually I decided to go visit her in Iowa. My truck broke down, turning what would have been a 2-day trip into a 5-day marathon. We kept seeing each other and a year or so later, I moved to Iowa. We dated, both (eventually, in my case) graduated from college, moved in together, got married, moved to Chicago, had all manner of angst interesting only to ourselves, and got divorced. A long series of events, to be sure.

But what was the causal event? Was it fate, or chance, or my failure to check the oil in my truck before driving to Iowa? Given the way things turned out, do I want to take responsibility for it? Well, Iￜm happier now than Iￜve been in years ￜ but what if I wasnￜt? Does the situation make me any more or less responsible for the course of my life?

In the end, I think it comes down to this: I can choose to believe that Iï¿œm responsible for what happens to me, or I can choose to believe that I am not. But I donï¿œt get to make that decision selectively. That is, if Iï¿œm responsible for my victories, then surely I am also responsible for my failures. Likewise, if it is cruel Fate which keeps me from meeting a goal today, then it is capricious Chance, rather than my own virtue, that allows me to meet the goal tomorrow. So the real question isnï¿œt so much about the sort of picture I want to paint, but whether I am in fact the painter at all.

5/29/04