Green Scissors

Tamarin mentioned one of his new favorite sites is www.wikipedia.org, which is a great free encyclopedia. I went there looking up some information on William James, and then decided to putter around a bit.

And a good thing I did, too! I found the following tidbit in the Monty Python section:

"On 24 March 2004, CNN reported that the film distributor Rainbow Film Company would be re-releasing Life of Brian at the end of April 2004 in Los Angeles and New York before expanding to other cities across the USA. This was reported to be a direct result of the release of Mel Gibson’s movie, The Passion of the Christ."

Could it be true? Could it be???? It is! Not only that, but a release schedule can be found at the semi-official Python site. Frankly, in my view this is the only bit of good that’s come from Gibson’s flick. Other than the morons who find themselves confessing to crimes from 20 years ago because of the movie, because frankly that’s just entertaining as hell.

And before you ask, Tamarin, yes, Kansas City is on the list, opening TOMORROW! We poor Chicago dwellers will have to wait until June 18.

*singing* Always look on the bright side of life…always look on the light side of life….

*edited to add: Also, SPAMALOT - a musical stage version of Monty Python and the Holy Grail - is proceeding apace. Apparently it’s planning a Broadway run to start in March 2005, but will have a run at the Schubert Theatre in Chicago starting December 2004. Huzzah! http://www.dailyllama.com/news/2004/llama236.html

On the heels of the Daily Grind, I got to wondering. What were some of your favorite hour long dramas from the 80s?

Post a comment to this story with one I forgot. No sitcoms this time. Perhaps next week we can explore the battle between Cosby, Family Ties, M*A*S*H and Bob Newhart.

Well, as Jason pointed out, its been awhile. Many reasons for that and none of them interesting to you. So lets get back to it. Today’s grind features the vast array of human ignorance and general stupidity and some nostalgia for bad 80s TV. Are they one and the same? The only way to know is to read on….

Is being dumb a recognized disability? Well, I would have to say no. But in the wonderful world of corporate HR policies the line is blurred a little. Take this for example. I’m not sure how I would have handled this situation but I am pretty sure I wouldn’t have been as calm as the author of this story.

Me: “Exactly what did I do?”
Intern: “Er… nothing, really…. she said she’s intimidated by you, because you talk about people and events that she knows nothing about, and she said it makes her feel stupid.”
Me: “You’re kidding, right?”
Intern: “We have to take it seriously, it’s in the manual. ”
Me: “Exactly what was it I said that got her upset?”
Intern: “She mentioned something about medical references, and once you talked about Henry VIII…. it bothers her that she doesn’t understand what you’re talking about most of the time. Oh, and McGuyver. ”
Me: “She’s upset because she doesn’t know who McGuyver is?”

Read the whole story for even more amazement.

On a related topic, apparently no one in the Texas government has read the HR manual. Seems the state of Texas has decided that Unitarianism isn’t a religion because the church lacks a single unified system of belief. Being a member of a Unitarian Universalist church I find this a bit off putting. It would seem to me to be pretty easy to find the definition of the church’s beliefs if you were to simply ask. But I guess a religion that was good enough for two US Presidents isn’t good enough for Texas. Find out more about Unitarian Universalism.

Seems I’m running a whole story on dumb people so…. Why do so many of the really weird stories come from Germany? Seems there was a couple trying to start a family and, well, you just have to read the rest

A German couple who went to a fertility clinic after eight years of marriage have found out why they are still childless - they weren’t having sex.

Finally, a little guilty pleasure for children of the 80s. The Greatest American Hero was a show without peer and a hell of a concept. For those of you who don’t remember, its the story of an average young man who finds a suit (from aliens?) that confers great powers. But the instructions didn’t come with it. What ensues is sort of a cross between McGuyver (and for those of you scoring at home, that’s two Richard Dean Anderson references today) and the Three Stooges.

Seems I’m not the only one with a soft spot for the old show. There are rumblings and rumors that a movie may be forthcoming in a few years.

I have had the theme song for Greatest American Hero stuck in my head for two days now. I would be greatful to anyone who can point me to an MP3 copy of it or better yet, the chord progressions so I can bang it out on guitar.

Well, isn’t this a fine how do you do. Two weeks and essentially no updates to the website. Scary, eh? I’d blame others for this failing (actually, I DO blame others) but I have to shoulder much of the responsibility for the oversight. Laziness. Whatever.

Of late I have spent some time perusing the Television Without Pity recaps. These are generally hysterical synopses of your favorite (or not-so-favorite) television programs including Angel, Buffy The Vampire Slayer, West Wing, Sports Night, X Filesï¿œwell, the list goes on. Go on, check them out. If you arenï¿œt amused, I guarantee that Iï¿œll give you nothing at all in compensation.

Another interesting accidental discovery in the world of science may bring about the elusive blue rose. This sounds like a code phrase for something, but really, itￜs a rose thatￜs blue. This discovery came about while doing some research into cancer and Alzheimerￜs disease, as it turns out. Interestingly, thereￜs no mention of the researchersￜ ongoing efforts into studying disease or working to end suffering. But there will be, you know, blue roses. So thatￜs something.

In other news of interest to only a few, Latharia, Hawke and I are continuing work on a new board game which we expect to take the world ￜ or, more to the point, very very small portions of it ￜ by storm. If any readers are artistically inclined and would be interested in possibly doing some work for us on this project, email me or leave me a Private Message here.

Thatï¿œs all Iï¿œve got for the moment. See you next time in the Daily…er, weeklyï¿œer, whenever I get to it Grind.

So the MSN Bot made a vengeful return yesterday logging another 10,000 hits on the site and burning through even more bandwidth. So far the search robot has accounted for over 90% of the sites bandwidth usage this month.

Below is the email I sent to Microsoft. I don’t expect a response from them, but one never knows.

Two days ago I wrote to you to complain about
your msnbot crawling my site and using 40% of my
monthly bandwidth in less than two days.
At the same time I proceeded to add msnbot to my
robits.txt file and disallowing access to all
areas of my site.

Two days have passed and your bot has made
another 10000 hits to my site ate
http://green-scissors.com. So far this month,
your bot has accounted for over 90% of the total
bandwidth usage on my site. This is completely
unacceptable. Despite the fact that I run a php
portal that has many dynamic pages, Google and
other search bots rarely register as a blip on my
log files. Your companies product, however, has
nearly shut down my site due to bandwidth
overusage.

I do not expect micrsoft (in all its wisdom) to
conform to my needs, although since you are
costing me money it would be a nice gesture. So
to combat this problem in that face of your bots
failure to acknowledge the entry in robots.txt, I
have IP banned 65.54.

If I find any further instances of your bot on my
site, I will further ban IP addresses.

My site is a small personal community site and
not a commercial venture. However, if it were I
would be following this email with legal action
to recoup to cost of the bandwidth you seem so
happy to consume.

I hope that in the future you can create a better
product. My site will not be appearing on MSN
search and I will encourage others to take
actions similar to mine.

Thank you.

After missing yesterday with work related Trauma and yet another loss for the Soccer Eagles (only 5 to 1, we are improving fast) the Daily Grind is back. And today I have a demand to make of all you loyal readers.

Submit a review! I am going to be adding more reviews in the near future and try to build up that section of the site which has gone neglected too long. Don’t worry about images or links, I’ll add em when your done. Two paragraphs is all it takes. So tell us about the Movie/Book/Band/Sports Team/ Software/Whatever that you’ve been thinking about.

And with that simple request we move on to the grind…

Gadget lust rears its head again. A review of the new Nokia 9500 for your pleasure. I am still looking for that perfect combination device and this one comes pretty close. Fold out phone with a big screen and a full QWERTY keyboard. Throw in an MP3 player and I would be in heaven.

Fuel Cells: Not just for concept cars anymore. Fuel cells are the next big thing for powering large equipment but now Casio has prototypes out there for a fuel cell laptop battery. With a projected use of 16 hours, it could seriously change the way a lot of people use their laptops. Release date is set for 2007.

I’ve known for awhile that power sources were the next big hurdle toward shrinking electronics even further. With a small fuel cell, almost anything is possible. I my lifetime I expect to see cars that cost one tenth the current cost to operate and personal electronic devices that use your own bodies physiology to power them. Rememebr, you heard it here first.

Sometimes, creative writing is not called for. These essays are short and hilarious. Funny to me because I didn’t have to grade them. The person who wrote them is probably in need of some counseling. Lucky for us, we don’t know him so we can laugh with impunity.

Where will you be when Andy returns. Andy Kaufman told his friends that he would fake his own death and return 20 years to the day afterwards. Well, that day is May 16th. So be ready, you’ll want to rememebr where you were when you heard the news.

Awesome mock up of the Ghostbusters gear. "We are each wearing an unliscenced nuclear accelerator on our back." Ah, the words all geeks long to hear. And now Jason Eaton has lived the dream. My firewall prevents me from accessing ebay, but you can actually buy this rig if you are so inclined.

Church of the Sub Genius. Don’t know what to say about this one. Just read through it. As with all religions, you will find bits you like and bits that make you scratch your head.

Library of Alexandria found? Well, the scientists think so. I am torn on this one. Part of me thinks it will be a gateway to a whole new understanding of the ancient world and part of me wonders what the overdue fines will be on the Dead Sea Scrolls.

And since I’ve got a thing for recursive images… on the heels of The Swirl found in Friday’s Grind I offer you this novel little version of a feline chain letter. The Infinite Cat!

That’s it folks, and remember no matter what anyone tells you, Coca Cola is not an effective spermicide

I think as a side note to the Daily Grind, I’ll throw in the quote from my Zen desk calanedar. So for today’s enlightenment….

A man cannot make a pair of shoes unless he do it in a devout manner. - Thomas Carlyle

I’m guessing ole Thom was a real hoot at parties. Also in today’s grind an item that all you RPGers should not miss. Grazing Antelopes! Read today’s grind!

On to the rest of the Grind….

Sony invented the walkman and then called it a day. This from Boing Boing (BTW, you should read Boing Boing everyday if you aren’t), Sony is tripping over itself these days. Ever since they became an entertainment company they have lost sight of what made them powerful in the first place

Back from 1976-1984, Sony was the company that spent hundreds of millions on the defense of its VCR, bringing it all the way to the Supreme Court, arguing that the entertainment industry didn’t have any right to its business-model; that if new technology could make the old business irrelevant, that was tough shit, and the movie companies needed to stop pewling and get with the program (they did, and made lots of money, besides).

These days everything Sony puts out has some pretty strict proprietary nonsense attached to it. Earlier this year I was thinking of buying a Mini-Disc player but the more I read about Sony’s efforts at DRM and their use of the completely crappy ATRAC format, the more thankful I am that I went with a traditional MP3 player.

For all you LoTR fans, now you can have the look and feel of old Rohan at home.

For your next roleplaying session what could be better than this great table from Middle Earth Furniture? I’ll warn you now, their site is a bit clunky but isn’t it worth it when you see this Ancient Ent Round Table. Of course the obvious question for me is whether the table is in the Entish style, or whenther it is genuine Ent? If so, aren’t there some "Sentient Species" laws that probably need to be put in place?

Speaking of Sony and the VCR battles of yore…

Seems the MPAA doesn’t think that making personal copies of DVDs falls under the "fair use" clause of the copyright and DCMA laws.

"There is no right in the copyright law to make backup copies of motion pictures, so the whole argument that people should have the right to make backup copies of DVDs has no legal support whatsoever," said Fritz Attaway, executive vice president of the MPAA.

 

"It’s against consumers’ interests to permit devices that make backup copies," he added, "because there is no way that a device can distinguish between a backup copy for personal use and making a copy for friends, family acquaintances or even selling on the street corner."

Huh? So I have no right to protect my media investment. Apparently DVDs never wear out (arguable) and never get damaged (wishful thinking). The good news in all of this is that it seems the lawmakers are beginning to see the light. Funny how they are only just now understanding the consequences of what they did when they passed the DCMA.

"I, like most members of Congress, had no idea that what would be deemed to be fair use for books, CDs, and TV programs is not the case for DVDs ï¿œ and nobody intended that the people that would enable you to make a single copy of a DVD should be held criminally liable and go to jail and that’s insane," Bob Livingston (search), former U.S. Republican representative from Louisiana and House Appropriations Committee chairman, told Foxnews.com.

Imagine that. A congressman out of touch with the real world.

Sometimes, the NBA really is FANtastic. Last night’s T-Wolves/Sacramaneto game was great. I saw two things I have never seen before in my life.

First, Sam Cassell racked up 5 fouls in less than 200 seconds on the floor. So Minnesota’s point guard was out of the game with over 8 minutes left in regulation. My brother will feel good about this since in high school he specialized in getting 2 fouls per minute of playing time.

This led to the second amazing event. Kevin Garnett, all 7′0" of him, running the point for the Wolves for the next 5 minutes. Folks, that guy is a stud. Long, smooth and oh so quick. Brings to mind Magic Johnson starting at center in the playoffs lo those many years ago.

Also, I should make a nod to Fred "The Mayor" Hoiberg who had 4 three pointers in a Steve Kerr like exhibition of shooting. I mention this because Fred went to high school with our own dawnuh here at Green Scissors which puts us all a mere three degrees of seperation from the NBA MVP.

Enjoy your day.

Well its Friday. And what should Friday bring but dozens of dastardly dum dums at work. Ok, its really only one or two but that’s alliteration for you.

So I am scrambling to do something in two days that should take a month but I still have time for the loyal readers of this site (all three of you) and so I present…..

Today’s grind.

Ever play this game with two mirrors? In computing this would be called an infinite loop. In real life its just ever so slightly nauseating and hypnotic. I am ashamed to admit I spent several minutes entranced.

Make your own Sci-Fi Script. I should really spend more time reading Davezilla and to that end I have added him to the RSS Reader. But this little gem from Dave is worth a look even if you aren’t a blog reader.

All’s fair in love war and ebay bidding. Remember the gentleman from a few Grinds back who put his ex-wife’s wedding dress on ebay. Well, celebrity has its price. Seems the high bid on the dress ($3800) was bogus. Luckily the gent isn’t hurting. Seems talk shows are willing to pay for his time.

And with that my fair friends, I am bailing out of the grinder and heading for home where a frosty adult beverage awaits.

I fucking hate days like this!
Nothing matters, noone cares
Least of all me
Its cold outside
Empty inside
And there’s nothing to be done about either one.
Where is my passion?
Where is my drive?
Where is my focus

What am I going to do?

She said "We just lived and lived"
But what is that?
When days blur together
When nights pass in obscurity
When another morning dawns
And you realize you haven’t felt alive for more days than you can count?
Then you have to ask…

What am I going to do?

What matters?
Music, books, friends, family
Where are they?
Where are those people who cherish
What I cherish?
And how can I find them?

What am I going to do?

Who do you love?
Who do you trust?
Who could ever understand the fury inside me?

How do you show someone your face
When you can’t see it for yourself?

What am I going to do?

Waves crash against me
First one, then another and another
Without end.

Invisible ocean smashing onto a void
How do you show another?
How do they believe?
Do they even care?

What am I going to do?

Where is my passion, drive, my focus?
Where is my life taking me?
Why is it I’m no longer in charge?
Who the fuck am I anyway?

What am I going to do?

The state of Michigan recently passed a law called The Conscientious Objector Policy Act, which protects healthcare workers from reprisal if they refuse to take part in a procedure they have moral or ethical issues with. This act, in part, is said to be an effort to protect the freedom of these individuals to not compromise their beliefs.

Wow. Well, isn’t this just a stinking pile of crap? On the one hand, I can understand the argument - after all, just because you work in a particular industry doesn’t mean that you should have to act in a way that violates your morals, right? On the other hand, my contention would be "shut the fuck up". Where do we draw the line with these ethical objections, anyway? What if I have an ethical objection to someone because, hell, they’re left-handed? Does that mean that as a doctor I could decide not to treat someone? Can’t I just decide that I don’t like the look of you, and make up a moral objection for it later?

This law also covers pharmacists, to give them an out if they decide that a particular prescription violates their moral standards. Apparently birth control pills can’t be objected to in this way (according to the law) but the so-called ‘morning after pill’ could be.

Actually, the legislation in question covers several new statues. A better description of each can be found here and here One particularly worrisome development is that one of the new laws covers insurance companies. Here’s a quote:

Notwithstanding any other provision of law, [an entity] may refuse to offer or provide a health care benefit that violates an ethical, moral, or religious principle reflected in its articles of incorporation, bylaws, or an adopted mission statement.

WTF?! Yeah, that’s just fantastic. Imagine trying to contact your insurance company to find out if a particular procedure is covered (something which is fraught with confusion in the best of circumstances). After your requisite 90 minutes listening to the hold music, you’re told that the procedure isn’t covered because the INSURANCE COMPANY has a goddamn moral objection to it? Sure, because insurance companies are known the world over for their strong moral values. Yeah.

*beating head against wall* I’m going to try and weigh in on this more intelligently later, but right now I can’t even begin to describe how stupid I think this is. Argh.